"move up, you must"

many a time there comes a day that shakes your very roots. you dont fall, you regain your strength and fight back. you reach higher than the last time-adaptation as darwin had called.

this nimbus i felt the same. i had slept through the first half of the first day and couldnt participate in any event. i was busy in the second half as i was a member of the core team. the second and third days also went by and all i could participate in was a quiz by the ece dept. on the final day, during the prize distribution ceremony ,for a change, i started to look back on my life and finally after straining my head to the hilt(remembering things gives me headaches) i concluded i've wasted most my life sleeping. that was the day i resolved not to sleep more than 6.5 hrs a day.

when i had come to college a couple of years ago, i had a planned everything out. plain laziness had made me dormant. dejected and sad, i went to bed that day but couldnt sleep. the pangs of remorse of not utlising most of my time were eating me from inside. that was the time i made my plans again. i figured out how i was going to spend the next 2 yrs at college. "when i pass out i dont want to look back and see myself whiling time away."
then i slept like a baby. i woke up early the next day. had all my meals and then sat down to work.
every birthday i take a new resolution. there are a few of them on which i'm yet to start. this sem and those yet to come, i'll make them reality.

this sem i'll study and prove myself correct. this sem i wont waste time. this sem i'll work!
"move up, you must."

it's a strange strange world!

i some times wonder what motivates people to do what they do. is it out of fear or quest for knowledge or experience or something even more abstract and unknown to me?

we had performed 8 experiments in our soil mechanics lab and i had written a couple in my journal. my file had been so since 5 weeks. every Thursday our prof. used to threaten us with hints of correcting it and marking it the next time. many a time i had borrowed files of my classmates to make another copy of a copy of a master copy. then the hunt for a pencil and a pen began (never mind the eraser, i hate the sight of those crumbs of rubber all over the desk/bed). All was in vain."kuch ni hota" was all i used to think and went to sleep every wednesday night. its so strange that when you don't need the stationery, the shop is always open and when you would give any price for a plastic sharpener, it's always closed. Many a time i managed to find a pencil too but the want of a sharpener made the last half an hour long adventure useless.

yesterday i got to know that today every ones practical files would be corrected and that a viva voce would also be conducted. last night with little will and sleepy eyes i sat down finally to complete my journal after tirelessly hunting for the master copy till l2.30am. with a heavy heart and the sight of my room mate sleeping i updated everything. i had manged to find a pencil of half the normal length and a sharpener. i made all the diagrams and completed the pencil work and even plotted many graphs. i had sharpened the pencil to a length that even the smallest of hands would find too short to work with. i had noted a couple of readings wrong and had drawn a few diagrams on the wrong pages. since i didn't have the luxury of an eraser i went for a long hot bath (i call them full course baths)at 5.20 am and was in bed by 6 am.
i woke up late today and almost missed the first class. i had a feeling that its not the day for a viva or correction. when everyone studied for it, i slept in the 3 hr long break.
and lo! even the practical was not conducted today! I'm psychic!
you are walking on the road and suddenly you think of a name of the person who's walking behind you. some times you look back to confirm who it is and 80 percent of the times its right! it does send shivers up my spine!!

i don't want to think about tomorrow. god only knows if I'll have faint dreams or unforgettable nightmares!